"i've been traveling on this road too long
just trying to find my way back home
the old me is dead and gone
dead and gone.."
i cringe whenever i think about
you;
not because i miss you.
not because i still long for you.
and definitely not because i still love you.
but because i've realised that you're longer the person i once knew. and just like me, you've changed for the worst. in fact, you've changed wayyyy much more than i have. and it hurts to know that the old kind, caring you has gone away and will never be back again.
i really feel for you.
-----
so that's the way life is - people change. people change all the time, actually. every second of every day of our lives. we're just too busy(?) to notice it sometimes. i for one, have admitted that i've been too caught up with what's been happening to my life to realise how much i've changed until recently. honestly, is it the same for you?
the adrenaline rush that i get whenever i see you; indescribable. the warmth i feel whenever your arms embrace me; magical. the feeling you leave me with whenever you kiss me; unexplainable. yes, you boy you.
baby's different from the rest.
and i love him so.
for knowing me so well.
for understanding me..
and like you said, b:
i may not be the best girlfriend there is around.
but i'm trying to be the best i can be for you. (:
and i know this will sound ridiculous.
but, but.
baby's admin number ends with a S.
while mine, ends with a N.
and baby's at block P, which is near the South canteen.
and i'm at block B, which is near the North canteen!
haha. coolshit or what? :D
still, i can't help but wonder if it's possible to feel this way towards somebody within such a short period of time. the first wasn't like this cause it took awhile to get me loving him. the second, i loved only towards the end of it all. the third, was close to me before it started, so the love was natural. but with baby.. with baby, it's just so so so so different.. it's like he dropped from heaven, and landed safely in my heart. ;P
and mairah goes:
"quantity doesn't matter.
quality does."
quite true, ain't it? (x
-----
dance was so tiring today, it was beyond tiring. i accidentally strained a muscle while centre-splitting, and now it hurts when i walk. maybe i'll call-in-sick for work tomorrow? and besides, i want baby. :(
met raymond with doreen and the rest after school! hahaa. :D
mary, mairah, doreen, dee. we girls should seriously have some quality time together. it's been such a fucking long time since we sat down and chilled. i fucking miss all of us together. and it's beyond fucking. sigh. am i making any sense?
work tomorrow.
sigh.
goodnight loves.
