no more gossiping together. no more pouring our hearts out about guys. no more saying "semangat nyp at ikea!" together. :( although i'll be seeing her at school, it's just not the same without her at ikea. sigh. just remember we'll all miss you dear. *hugs*

anyway, as i have promised hanis, below is nypkia's video. ;)

YOU BETTER FUCKING LISTEN TO IT;

cause it's fucking nice shit. hahahahaa. :D

saiful can fucking sing. hahaa. i'm jealous. really, i am. x)

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work was pretty tiring. i think i'm tired of being all polite and courteous to the customers anymore. it's tiring smiling at them, when they give me shit attitude. in fact, it's just sickening when you ask them politely to empty their yellow bags or push their trollies forward, and they start slamming things and squishing your toes with their trollies' wheels. ugh. (yes, they really do squish my feet.) and all the time you're smiling. pffft.

he visited me at work today. i just felt like crying and breaking down when i saw him. i was already tearing as i served that customer. i wanted to hug him, the way i've been needing a real hug. a hug that would mean everything would be okay. a hug that'd say everything will work out, everything would fall into place. i wanted so badly to just stop work just to have lunch/dinner with him. i wanted so badly to tell him to stop all of this from happening.

crying your hearts out while showering makes you feel better. at least it made me feel better. as i fell to the floor, water running down every inch of my body, i curled up and bit my forearm to stop the sobbing. i cried because i'm confused. i cried because i know you're confused. i cried because i know everything's not okay.

now that daddy's going overseas for iunno-how-long again, it's going to happen all over again. i'm going to miss him - believe it or not. i miss all of us together, in fact. don't any of you see that?

i want hot chocolate.

i want you.

loads of meet-ups this week. (: